All day today I have been trying to figure out how to tie bread baking and emotional relationships with food together. I came up empty. Until I saw the pictures. More on that in a bit.
Today I decided would be a great day for baking bread. Our bread machine wore out and we needed bread. Normally I make bread (in the machine) nearly every day. Last weekend I tried to make some from scratch and ended up with 2 bricks. I am wondering now, if perhaps I was getting brown rice pastry flour from the bulk bin at the natural foods market instead of whole wheat flour……anyway, this time I had genuine whole wheat flour and we were in dire straits when it came to lunch time all week.
I used my text and this is the recipe for 100% whole wheat bread:
nonfat dry milk powder, 1.25 oz
whole wheat flour, 1lb 10 oz
warm water, 18 fl. oz
active dry yeast, 1/2 oz
honey, 3 oz
unsalted butter, 1 oz
combine salt, milk and 12 oz of flour in lg mixer bowl. Stir in water, yeast, honey and softened butter. Beat until combined into thick batter like dough. Add remaining flour 2 oz at a time. Knead on med. speed approx. 8 min. until dough is smooth and elastic. Place dough in a lightly greased bowl and cover. Let dough ferment in a warm place until doubled.
Punch down, portion and shape. Let dough proof until doubled, bake at 375 until firm and dark brown, approx 1 hr for loaves, 20 min for rolls.
These are the whole wheat breads. Below are the buckwheat breads. I added some vital wheat gluten to the dough and I think it made the difference. I can’t wait until I have more flour to try the vital wheat gluten in the whole wheat bread too.
OK, here’s THE picture that let’s me relate this to emotions and food and body image and the whole nine yards:
Now, you can see the loaves go from smallest to biggest. I didn’t measure with a scale when I portioned for the bread pans, that was a mistake, BUT can you see what I see?? These breads all have the same things in them, flour, water, yeast, a sugar and a bit of fat. I put the same amt of work into each loaf, yet look how different they are. That’s the way we are too! We all have the same ingredients in us, we can work out at the same intensity, follow the same diet and come out with drastically different results and that’s OK! We are similar, but different. Our genes may “portion” us out differently too. Its natural. Its supposed to be that way. How cool is that? Individuality is everywhere! OK, maybe that’s a stretch if you think about factory made breads, but for my purposes, this illustration fits just fine, thank you very much.
I also made these today, diabetic friendly cookies. Made with half the fat, half the sugar and LOT’S of fiber. AND you know what??? I ate TWO! so there! LOL. Really. (They are actually for a friend at church who is diabetic. I always bring the cookies and coffee, and I want him to enjoy them w/o having to pop a pill.)
Since digging deep for this blog and writing it, I have been finding myself struggling. I cycle through the day sometimes with bad thoughts about my body, to believeing what I am writing. Don’t get me wrong, I believe what I am writing, I feel it in my very soul, BUT there will come a day like yesterday, when I felt like I was hungry all flipping day! My new mantra is to eat when I am hungry and stop when I am full. How the heck is that going to work when I am hungry all day?? So, to find some peace, I plugged my food into the sparkpeople food tracker, and low and behold it wasn’t as bad as I thought. Then I felt in control again. That’s a key trigger for me, feeling out of control….food wise, emotion wise etc. I apologized to my husband for being such a mess emotionally, he hugged me and told it was OK, he loved me and understood, and that I should write about those struggles too. So, I am still a work in progress. I did get out and enjoy the fleeting sun a bit. I planned on going for a walk, ended up being a jog and I actually did better than I thought I was going to. So, I shall continue to eat when I am hungry and stop when I am full, and bless my body with nutrition and exercise.
Tomorrow I plan to roast 2 chickens. I need the bones to make more stock!
See you tomorrow. If you want the buckwheat bread recipe or the cookie recipe, let me know.
hey, do you think there’s such a thing as food psychology?? I will have to look into that.